Thursday, March 16, 2006

I've been vacationing with the kids this past week. It's been so great visiting my family in Texas. It's rodeo time here and my hubby and I took the kids for some "Agventure."
While we were enjoying the carnival, my daughter needed to use the bathroom or port-o-potty. If you are at an outdoor event and the only bathrooms available are port-o-potties make sure to tell your kids in advance that the round deoderizing-object inside the men's urinal is not soap!
(My daughter actually picked the thing up and in what seemed like movie-slow-motion, I yelled "drop it" as I tried to knock it from her grasp)
And always pack lots of handy wipes and sanitizing hand wash when attending outdoor events.


Fightin' Mad Mary said...

OMG Kelley, I laughed out loud at this one. I can't wait for you to tell her this story when she is 16.

This story makes me wonder about my childhood and what foul stuff I might have touched - my parents raised me in Manhattan - I can only imagine what strange objects I might have picked up. Double Gross!

I hope you're having fun! Hurry up and get back to LA - we miss you.

Kelley said...

Double Gross-LOL!
I had a great time-thanks.

Lord Alistair Kilwhillie said...

Hurry back to LA indeed!!! (scoff)...full of loons I'm told. As far as the tale of your young childs exploits in the "port-o-potty" goes, I find it thoroughly disconcerting.

I remember some years ago, we decided to hold a small gathering of several hundred people on the lawn. The issue of adequate facilities was raised by my estate manager, and it was recommended that portable facilities be delivered via lorry. Well, you can imagine my reaction...after all, this isn't some backpackers hovel we are running here.

I was of the opinion that the indoor facilities would be more than sufficient (there are 26 toilets afterall)...sadly, the attendees got a bit into their libations, and the next morning we found that several visitors to one of the downstairs toilets had missed.

I told our man Bertrand that he best don the rubber gloves and have lose at the mess...he didn't seem the least bit concerned.

Awful business that! In any case my dear, I have noticed that you seem to visit The Bargewright Inn rather a lot. We here are certainly appreciative of your patronage...not to mention your lovely picture...if you are ever in the mood to enjoy a memorable weekend with a slightly (dirty) older gentlemen, do feel free to leave your man in LA with the children and shoot over...

I assure you the utmost discretion...Kingussie after all, is a rather private place, and far beyond the reach of jealous husbands. Besides, that is what I employ security for...

Best regards!

Lord Alistair Kilwhillie of Kingussie

Kelley said...

I'm flattered indeed, Lord Alistair Kilwhillie. I've so wanted to return to the land of green! I won't soon forget the invitation.

Lord Alistair Kilwhillie said...

"Flattered"? I was rather hoping for something more along the lines of "tempted." Oh well, I suppose it is just as well...after all, with a wife and and at least one mistress (that I acknowledge publically at least), how can I seriously expect to attend to all of my...gentlemanly that area?

Perhaps if I were a few decades younger, I would be more up to the task...but alas, time it seems has caught up with me. I can barely muster the energy for my 10 mile daily swim in the Loch, nor my thrice weekly hill walking excursion...surely, a woman of your...youth and grace would want nothing to do with a man whose constitution leaves so much to be desired.

No, I am afraid my fate is sealed...I will simply wither away here on my 72,000 acre estate in the Highlands...removed from all of life's little pleasures. Exceedingly lonely, with nothing but my ostentatious fortune, a few casks of 32 year old Dalwhinnie, and the depressing dream of a brief trist with some young thing...more's the pity.

Weep not for me my dear, for gentlemen always carry on...